FUNNY QUOTES

• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. (Lana Turner)  ffff

• A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice. (Bill Cosby)

• I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. (Frank Sinatra)

• When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only i suffer!!!

• When I was born Devil said...Oh Shit!!! Another GOD!!!..& When u were born devil said ...Oh Shit!!!!Competition...!!

• If ur world is spining Round & Round..& Round....Ur heart is beating fast ,do u think its LOVE? na Munna na its called high B/P...

• The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesnt it rain on you?

• i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again

• girls are like phones. we like to be held and talked too- but if u press the wrong button u'll be disconnected!

• If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

• If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you’re a tool.

• can you lend me 2000 Rs? i need it. please help me out, i know you have it, i wil return it .a sardar asks to ATM machine?

• can you lend me 2000 Rs? i need it. please help me out, i know you have it, i wil return it .a sardar asks to ATM machine?

• Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE. It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!, WIFE satys No, it means -With Idiot for Ever.

• Friendship is like peeing your pants. Everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.

• A politician is a fellow who will lay your life down for his country.

• If you are one in a million, there are six thousand people just like you.

• A baby-sitter is a teenager acting like an adult while the adults are out acting like teenagers.”

• You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said ‘Parking Fine.’”

• I now know I’m psychic, because every time I go see a fortune teller, I know everything she says will be absolute bullshit ahead of time.”

• I am sorry for those that disagree with me because I know that they are wrong.”

• They keep saying the right person will come along. I think mine was hit by a truck…”

• Most people are only alive because it’s illegal to shoot them.

• Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

• “Wouldn’t it be nice if the world was flat? That way we could just push off the people we don’t like.”  

• I hate when I go to bed and I forget to turn my swag off.

• If God made everything, then God must be Chinese?”